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I promised I’d get back to you with more beach-inspired musings following my last post Surfing the waves, so picture this…

Beforehand, yours truly running in a surf lifesaving vehicle’s tyre rut in soft sand with zero footprints on the track.

Happy days, in that it lessened the load and gave a weird sense of being free in a constrained kind of way.

All was well until I did a 180, only to realise that the other track had been taken, used, trod on, destroyed…if you will.

So back I tracked in same old rut only to discover how awkward it was to run backwards in my own prints.

Therefore, with eyes back on the other track, I jumped the divide to test the difference, which was akin to being bounced around in choppy waters, as it was difficult to get into a rhythm and groove. These footprints clearly belonged to someone taller and heavier than me. We were so not in synch, making it extremely difficult.

This is what got me thinking of empathy.

Walk a mile in my shoes, the saying goes.

Heck, I could barely walk a mile in my own, which threw up the maxim ‘know thyself’, which, clearly, I was struggling with!

As for having empathy with others, that’s a whole different ballgame, which in this footprint moment reminded me that it can be oh so hard.

And so, I began to think about the nuts and bolts of having empathy and figured I’d briefly share them with you as a reminder of what’s required…

• Try to understand the other person’s perspective, thoughts and feelings.
• See if you can recognise and resonate with their emotional states and how they are feeling.
• Make sure you can manage your own emotions effectively, so that you don’t get overwhelmed.
• Have genuine care and compassion for their well-being…an absolute given.
• Now you’ll be better placed to take thoughtful and skillful action to support them, even if this may no line up with your own interests.
• Of course, stay out of judgement and be open and accepting. This will keep you from falling into the sympathy or pity trap.
• Lastly, see if you can correctly recognise and validate their emotions and in doing so, demonstrate that you care.

Does this sound easy? No.

Is it doable with mindful practise? Absolutely.

Like that young surfer in my previous post, you’ll likely fall and fail, but if you’re determined to keep getting back on that board, you’ll eventually succeed.

As for the ‘why’? Just give it a try. The payoff will be worth its weight in gold as numerous positives begin to unfold.

Onwards with empathy!

Here’s to staying on track…

PS – Consider working with me directly if you are interested in some wellbeing coaching. Hit the reply button to this email with “yes, more information please”.

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